Sunrise Sunset Staircase

Back in late December 2016, I had to do a final clean-out of my townhome -- my little post-divorce landing pad that ended up being home for nearly five years.   I'd been dreading it.  There was just so much to do at our new home, and I really did not feel like taking a few hours of that precious time away to clean out my old place -- all of my furniture and things were gone, and the house was just an empty shell needing its final clean before I handed over the keys.  It was something I had to do, so I sucked it up and went to my old empty home with an armful of cleaners, my vacuum cleaner and Pandora's Lionel Richie station at the ready.

I had, as is customary for me, an itemized plan of attack: first spackle the nail holes, then work my way up from the basement to the main floor and finally finish up on the third floor with the bedrooms and baths.  Once all the nail holes were filled in, and about 15 minutes into my cleaning frenzy, I became acutely aware of just why it became necessary, rather than a luxury, to hire my house-cleaner.  The basement was a pretty easy space to clean -- it held the kids' playroom and a small tv/game playing area, and of course my bike trainer.  So.many.hours. on that bike trainer back in 2014.  Basement - check.  Up a floor I went.  I cleaned the kitchen, and the fridge and oven and cabinets.  I cleaned the living room.  The fireplace.  Tried in vain one last time to get out that purple nail polish stain in the one spot on the carpet where my then-5 year old had a pedicure mishap.  Main floor - check.  Up the steps to my last floor - first my bedroom and then my bathroom, which used to have horrible wallpaper that I painstakingly took down and painted instead.  Then the kids' bathroom - check.  Then the kids' rooms - check.  And finally, after about 4 hours on a cold December morning, I was done. The list was checked off.  The to-dos were done.


I grabbed all of the cleaning supplies and threw them (literally - I literally threw them) in the car, along with the vacuum.  I took out the last few bags of trash.  I did one final walk through to make sure I had cleaned every nook and cranny, turned off all of the lights, and taken all of my things.  Check.  Only, instead of bounding down the stairs and heading out the door without looking back, I found myself looking around with tears in my eyes at my now empty home.  And home it was:  what was intended to be a temporary landing pad had become my home for over four years. 

It was a good place.  It was a necessary step in my new life.  I sat down on the main staircase and remembered doing the exact same thing in the exact same spot right after I signed my lease.  I remember I was there on a weekday afternoon in April 2012 waiting for the cable people to come and for whatever reason, at that moment, sitting there on the grey carpeted steps of a completely empty home made my whole situation real: this is your home, this is happening, this is yours - yours, singular, yours.  It was overwhelming and terrifying and exciting and very, very real. That was one of those flashbulb moments that we all have in our lives - those little random snippets of time that stick with us forever.  I don't remember the day or what I was wearing or what else was happening otherwise in my life, but I remember sitting on those steps and realizing that life as I knew it had completely changed. Over those four + years, we made the townhouse a home - lost teeth, hugs, laughs, tears, milestones, Band-aids, boo-boos, messes, puzzles, good news, bad news, you  name it. 

And there I sat years later in the very same spot, but in a completely different place.  It was a true sunrise/sunset moment in my life.  

I was ready and excited for my new home with my soon to be husband and our new family.  But there was something so bittersweet about saying goodbye to the home that saw me from those first moments of bewilderment and fear to the woman I had become and to the life that I had obtained.  I wouldn't necessarily miss the house, but I felt a twinge of sadness to say goodbye to the home.  Which brings it all full circle ... back to the first blog post I published upon my separation.  Over those four years, I realized that a home was not a house and a house was not a home - that "home" was the people you love, rather than a structure in which you live.  And now, almost a year later, my home is with my darling husband and children in the wonderful family that we have created in the beautiful house in which we live.  But there will be forever a piece of me that is grateful for that little home that was there for me when I started my life over, at my most vulnerable, and became a place of safety, security and love.  


 photo sig_zps903hgg96.png

35 comments:

  1. I guess you are now happy with your new apartment. It's a great review of Essaydune that you might love to read on how to make easy moving.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Forged railingsis the most original thing I’ve ever seen! her latest blog

    ReplyDelete
  3. Both Forte and 475 West 18th Street are excellent examples of the capabilities of CLT and mass timber products. However, they may only represent humble beginnings to a larger, taller trend. In Vancouver, an 18-story dormitory at the University of British Columbia recently topped out and a 24-story mixed-used hotel cross laminated timber companies and apartment project is being developed in Vienna, Austria. In addition, research completed by SOM in 2013 and 2014 found that a 42-story wood high-rise is feasible with current technologies.

    A tower of this height would reduce its carbon footprint by upwards of 75% when compared to a concrete or steel tower of the same height. These current and future tests will be important for the CLT and mass timber industry as economies of scale continue to reduce clt manufacturers and material waste while increasing carbon sequestration in comparison to typical high-rise construction. All projects point to a prosperous future for CLT and the potential for a game-changing material in the construction industry.

    Laminated Timber Solutions is an industry acknowledged supplier of large span and highly complex load-bearing structures CLT building system in glued laminated timber elements. We engineer, design, manufacture and install enhanced timber structures for major construction projects.

    Contractors, architects and builders have benefited from our expertise in this specialist sector for over 60 years. Our impressive track record in the field of engineering, production Modern CLT House and installation enables us to deliver sports complexes, multi family residential developments, municipal and commercial buildings that demand the highest structural or aesthetic needs.

    Laminated Timber Solutions exclusively specialise in advanced glued timber construction US Cross Laminated Timber House elements. Glue laminated timber is a composition of solid section timber elements combined to deliver specific engineering performance.

    We offer three different glued timber solutions for the construction of commercial, municipal residential, retail, logistics and agricultural buildings Cross Laminated Timber Building glued laminated timber (GLULAM) and cross-laminated timber (CLT). In addition, Laminated Timber Solutions is the exclusive Benelux, French and UK licensee for Kielsteg, an advanced large span engineered beam element.

    ReplyDelete
  4. The mission of Nishtha is to promote that knowledge base along with ethics and good conduct in professionals, educate and orient them in the field of project management and develop skills in them that would then bring immense value in Organizations for management of their projects in a superior and successful manner.
    pmp training chennai
    ms project training in chennai
    pmp certification online
    pmp classes in chennai

    ReplyDelete
  5. Acupuncture is designed to help facilitate blood flow, remove muscle obstructions, and relax the nervous system. Those who undergo treatment at our facility may experience a decrease in ongoing pain and improvement in sleep and digestive issues. At Beddington Physiotherapy Ltd, we’re committed to providing effective, comprehensive acupuncture treatments in a warm, welcoming environment. So if you’re thinking about acupuncture, we invite you to visit our facility to learn more.
    physiotherapy calgary
    physiotherapy nwcalgary
    Acupuncture Calgary
    Physiotherapy Calgary NW
    spinal manipulation treamtment in Calgary
    massage therapy Calgary nw
    Exercise Therapy Calgary
    Exercise physiotherapy Calgary

    ReplyDelete
  6. We At Cheam Airport Services Come Up With Top Quality, Highly Professional And Timely Services To Our All Important Clients Irrespective Of The Location.
    cheam cabs
    gatwick taxi
    taxi to stansted
    heathrow minicab
    luton airport taxi

    ReplyDelete
  7. We At Epsom Airport Minicabs Services Come Up With Top Quality, Highly Professional And Timely Services To Our All Important Clients Irrespective Of The Location.
    cabs in epsom
    gatwick airport taxi
    stansted airport taxi
    heathrow cabs
    luton minicab

    ReplyDelete
  8. We are a reputed airport transport providing company providing reliable taxi, Minibus & airport transfer services 24/7 in London.
    Cheap Airport Minibus
    Gatwick 7 Seater minibus
    Stansted Airport Minibus
    Heathrow 8 Seater minibus
    Airport minibus to epsom
    Cheam 9 Seater minibus

    ReplyDelete
  9. Domestic services, and more particularly home cleaning, relieves from your family's shoulders all the workload necessary. To make ends meet, a lot of individuals are now so much more focused on their careers, that they no longer have time to allot to cleaning. This makes it always a better option to hire domestic cleaning services. The benefits from these services range from keeping up the hygiene of your home up to protecting your valuable property investment. Maid Service

    ReplyDelete
  10. When you are upgrading your kitchen, you may need to understand how to work out in what order to bring about the changes. Kitchen interior

    ReplyDelete
  11. Proprietors remarks anyway demonstrate that reviving the unit can take from somewhere in the range of 7 and 10 hours.home cleaning

    ReplyDelete
  12. I’m impressed, I have to say. Really hardly ever do I encounter a weblog that’s both educative and entertaining, and let me inform you, you have hit the nail on the head. Your thought is excellent; the difficulty is something that not sufficient individuals are talking intelligently about. I am very completely satisfied that I stumbled across this in my seek for something referring to this. Divorce procedure in pakistan

    ReplyDelete
  13. Industry professionals, including 3D Print companies, will be able to add their Business and Services for FREE. More information,
    3d print companies

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hi buddies, it is great written piece entirely defined, continue the good work constantly.
    page

    ReplyDelete
  15. We help students achieve their goals to Study Abroad, Score high in Foreign Entrance Exams, or learning a new language.
    Spoken English Classes in Chennai
    ielts Coaching in Chennai

    ReplyDelete
  16. Much refreshing such an incredible sum for this information. I have to disclose to you I concede to a couple of the centers you make here and others may require some further review, anyway I can see your point of view. ucuz uçak bileti

    ReplyDelete
  17. Its a mind boggling satisfaction examining your post.Its overflowing with information I am looking for and I need to post a comment that "The substance of your post is sublime" Great work. Buchhaltung Baden

    ReplyDelete
  18. Home Improvement product store in Long Island, New York Long Island Home improvement decor

    ReplyDelete
  19. Ufak boyuttaki eşyalarınız farklı ambalajlama yöntemi ile büyük boyutlu eşyalarınızda farklı yöntemler ile koruma altına alınır. Ambalaj için müşterilerimizin söylemsine gerek duyulmadan standart olarak bu işlemi her evden eve nakliyat hizmetimizde uygulamaktayız. şehirler arası nakliyat

    ReplyDelete
  20. İstanbul’da ev eşyanızı koymak için kiralık depo arıyorsanız, doğru adrestesiniz. eşya depolama

    ReplyDelete
  21.  In this guide, we will discuss what this mistake means and how to unravel it. We’ll stroll through a couple of model situations to assist you with recognizing expected causes and arrangements. tableau interview questions

    ReplyDelete
  22. This article is an appealing wealth of informative data that is interesting and well-written. I commend your hard work on this and thank you for this information. You’ve got what it takes to get attention. 集客代行サービス

    ReplyDelete
  23. Thank you very much for this great post. I read that Post and got it fine and informative. Please share more like that. white house market

    ReplyDelete
  24. Your blog is great. I read a lot of interesting things from it. Thank you very much for sharing. Hope you will update more news in the future. For instant support related to Download QuickBooks Password Reset Tool please contact our technical expert for help

    ReplyDelete
  25. 8TogeL adalah situs GAME TOTO Online terlengkap aman dan terpercaya dengan server kualitas terbaik dan tercepat tanpa admin ataupun robot yang ikut bermain bonus kemenangan nyata ratusan juta

    ReplyDelete
  26. Stressed over the very late Cancellation of your Air ticket? With the Hawaiian airlines cancellation policy, you can be just about as adaptable as you need, with moderate Hawaiian airlines cancellation charges, oversimplified cancellation rules, and bother-free technique, you can get your flight cancel with ease. Visit our website to know more.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Thanks for sharing this information and If you’re looking Laminate Bedroom Doors and Keyless Door in Singapore, please visit our blog Laminate Bedroom Doors in Singapore and Keyless Door Locks for a Better Home

    ReplyDelete
  28. Cleaning your carpets can be a chore, but with us, it’s made simple and easy. We have solutions for all surfaces; including carpets, tiles, furniture, mattresses, and more. Fabric and tile care is our priority, as well as getting everything squeaky clean. It’s not just the cleaning that’s guaranteed; we also offer a 100% satisfaction guarantee with our services Mississauga Carpet Cleaning

    ReplyDelete
  29. I am very thankful for such a wonderful blog. It's very interesting to read and easy to understand. Thanks for sharing. VRS Software is the best Textile ERP Software India for textile industry, helps to integrate varied organizational systems and facilitates error-free transactions and production.

    ReplyDelete
  30. for each famous area. It doesn't matter what kind of games you like. We are ready to serve The ดูบอลออนไลน์

    ReplyDelete
  31. Taxi from Wimbledon to Heathrow - Cars 24/7 hours Wimbledon taxi service to Heathrow and Gatwick Airport transfers. Friendly and reliable airport transfer.

    ReplyDelete
  32. PCO Car Hire - Are you a PCO driver looking for ways to diversify and build your income

    ReplyDelete